Part 1: The secret rousing thoughts of a 26 YO female

After a tiny ulcer at the tip of my tongue took away my ability to talk and eat for a week, Loong Seng finally dragged me to the doctor for a check-up. A dollop of numbing cream and 4 red and yellow antibiotic pills later, with great difficulty I have to admit yet again, my man did the right thing.   

Ecstatic that I had full control of my tongue again, I indulged in a triple decked grilled cheese sandwich with deep fried potatoes. Twice.

Most delicious grilled cheese sandwich in Malaysia

To be fair, I did cut an apple to appease my inner demons...and Loong Seng. The doctor recommended I should consume more vitamins and water.

Today I pay the price for those deliciously good sandwiches. It's weird how grilled cheese immediately knows where to go on your body. It's attacking my gut now. I'm trying to exercise it off but my mind's distracted.  I keep thinking of my piling Master's assignments and my dying bank account.


Speaking of Masters, I’m halfway through it and the journey has been rough.

It’s not the Masters itself that is hard but the unexpected circumstances surrounding it. I keep reminding myself, only 7 months to go!

Sometimes, I worry if I'm doing the right thing. Honestly, I would never know but I'm certain this "struggle" will make its rounds at many drunken wine nights to come. Oh, and to my children, and then my grandchildren.

Just in case, I’d write a memoir to my greatgrandchildren and future descendants. Maybe also add in a few nudes of me and grandpa (theirs!) for shock value. I take my matriarch duties very seriously.

But leaving legacies aside for now, Christmas is in two months! Can you believe that?


Where did 2018 even go??

I used to look forward to Christmas very much but now that I'm older, not so much anymore. To me, it just feels melancholic and a good toast goodbye to the year that was. 

I live for the Christmas decor though, which has been becoming increasingly retail oriented. Nippon paint bucket Christmas tree, anyone? I still have not forgiven you, The Curve Damansara!

I look forward to Chinese New Year more now because it feels like a new beginning to everything. After working at a Chinese metaphysics agency in 2017, I've learnt to accept and embrace life’s lemons better. Plus, the yearly predictions are fun to read. And then the food and hongbao…

Okay, stop, I’m salivating.

In all seriousness, 2018 was tough but I was hoping we could make amends before the year leaves. I know I keep stressing that the year was hard but really, I’m exaggerating.

It's never been a bad kinda hard, I feel that it's a good kind of hard. Does that make sense?

I spent the first years out of college travelling and not giving a shit about finances. I’ve got no one to blame but myself for such bad foresight. I’m getting bitten hard this year but I’m learning so much at such a quick pace.

Can you believe on December 31st, 2016, I cried hard because I thought that life cannot get any more interesting than 23? I secretly wish I could go back in time and slap myself hard. This is why I’m not allowed to touch a time machine because I’d go back and harass a lot of memories (and people).

For things that I thought were toxic or unsavoury, I appreciate that it happened because I was miserable and too chicken to make things happen myself. I am grateful someone else had the balls to do it for me despite my protests. And I'm reaping the benefits. So, a sincere heartfelf thank you!

Now, I intend to fully enjoy the final two months of 2018 to its fullest because I’m done with the anxiety and stress.

about Alicia Chrissy

Discovering the adult world one diaper at a time, I share my travels, discoveries and inspirations. .